Everyone’s gone to bed except for him and Steve, and Steve seems pretty comfy with sleeping on Tony’s chest, the weirdo. He has this thing for the arc reactor, Tony has realized- Steve draws it, renders it in charcoal and watercolours.
It’s comforting, Steve told him once. It means you’re around.
Tony doesn’t remember what he had replied, but he’s sure it had been sarcastic and short-lived, since he remembers going down to the workshop to let himself blush like a twelve year old girl.
"Fuck, I love you," Tony hears himself say, and then he freezes. But Steve’s deep breathing doesn’t stir and none of his teammates pop out from behind the TV to yell ‘AHA,’ so Tony relaxes.
Minutes pass and the Tower seems well and truly asleep, so Tony takes a breath and says, quietly, just in case: “You know, I can’t tell you how much easier it was when we hated each other. That was- simple. I could handle that.”
Bruce:When I moved in, he insisted on funding all of my research. Except, you know, ever since The Incident, all my work's been theoretical. It's not actually that expensive. I've started just spending all the extra on fruit pies, just to see if he was keeping track. He isn't. There are a lot of unused rooms in this building, and at least three of them are stacked floor to ceiling with fruit pies. He hasn't said a word.
Natasha:It turned out Pepper and I both speak French. Tony doesn't. Now, whenever he walks in, we just start whispering in French and giggling. Half the time we're just exchanging recipes. He pretends not to be eavesdropping, but the other day I caught him asking JARVIS what 'des oeufs' meant.
Clint:I bought this big bag of little plastic flies, right? And whenever he's not paying attention, I throw them into his drink. Half the time he doesn't even notice and just drinks the damn things, but the other half? He starts checking all the house filtration systems, the exterminators, the works. He can't figure out where all these flies are coming from. He's fumigated three times in the last month.
Thor:I attempted to provide assistance with a project, but Stark assured me that it was 'very technical', and that I would not understand the intricacies. I can see why he would think so, as I am a mere Prince of Asgard, taught such basic engineering when I was a child and his ancestors could not yet walk. It has been five weeks, and he still has not corrected the misaligned condenser coil causing the problem.
Steve:I don't know what Howard taught that kid, but he seems to be under the impression that homosexuality was invented in 2000. He keeps leaving magazines and pictures lying around like the sight of two men holding hands is going to give me a heart attack. I don't have the heart to tell him about the Greeks.
Interviewer:So how are things in Avengers Tower?
Tony:How are things? I have no idea. I really don't. There's some kind of insect infestation in the vents and I think a spy is trying to seduce my girlfriend into moving to France. I tried to prank Captain America with gay porn, but him and Thor just started trying to reverse-engineer workout routines. The other day I went into one of the spare rooms, and I found some kind of one-armed sex hobo sitting on a throne of empty fruit pie boxes. I just walked out and closed the door. I don't even wanna know.